FEATURED ARTICLE
OSHA announcement last week cleared the way for estimated three and half million workers stranded in offices and cubicles that are affected by this rapidly spreading disease. Now they can claim their benefits. Industry analysts are expecting long and difficult legal battle with HMO's.
'Having Two Left Hands' and 'Being Full Of It!'
Officialy Recognized by OSHA
'Daily Cubicle'
 
   
  There is a small rural town, somewhat northeast to the city of Niagara Falls, NY. One evening, a resident of the town called the local volunteer fire department to request assistance in removing their cat from a tree. Since this was a "questionable" call, the fire control dispatcher called the fire chief at home to ask if he wanted to respond. The chief said sure, call out the department, since it was early evening and it shouldn't be a problem for the volunteers to respond. The fire department responded with a rescue truck which had an extension ladder. The tree, however, was too tall and willowy to support the weight of the extension ladder. Rather than send men back to the fire hall to bring the aerial ladder truck, one of the firefighters suggested an alternate course of action. Two of the firefighters supported the ladder while a third climbed high enough to tie a rope around the tree at about half its height. The other end of the rope was tied to a trailer hitch on a pickup truck, with the truck slowly driven forward, forcing the tree to bend over. One firefighter was poised to grab the cat as soon as it was within his reach. The knot securing the rope to the trailer hitch slipped free. The cat was last seen airborne heading south toward the city of Niagara Falls, and was never seen again. This incident adds a rather new definition to the word "catapult."  
   
(from http://www.zipadeeday.com and
http://www.darwinawards.com)

 
 
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Dick Chaney with friends celebrates his
In Your Face award
 
COWORKERS APPRECIATION
  The Dumbest Statement of the Week
  The Most Complaining Employee of the Week
  The Lamest Excuse of the Week
  The Scareiest Outfit of the Week
  Never At His Desk
  Never At Her Desk
  Long Time No See
  Rubbing Other's Back
  Sudden Disappearances
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  Hot Crotch
  Dork
  Big Mouth
  Wise Guy
  Drooling
 
MANAGEMENT RECOGNITION
  Inefficiency
  The Messiest Cubicle
  Royal Pain in the Butt
  You're Fired !
  No Promotion
  Inability to Get Anything Done
  No Raise
  Overtime Without Any Pay
  Lack of Enthusiasm
  Selective Hearing Impairment
  I Don't Understand
  I Can't Take It Anymore
  Leadership Incompetence
  Lying Through Your Teeth
 
HEALTHY WORKPLACE
  Fed up with Everything
  I'm Sick and Tired !
  I Had Enough !
  I'm Out of Here !
  Full of Crap
  Make My Day !
  Sticking Your Nose Into Everything
  Get Lost !
  You Again !
  This is Not My Job !
  I Can't Do This !
  I Don't Know
  I'm Too Busy Right Now
  You Broke It !
  What Do You Want !
  In Your Face
  Smart Ass
  Stupid Ass
  Bitching
  Being Annoying
 
SPECIAL SKILLS
  Breaking Things Faster Than They Can be Replaced
  Stressing Out Fellow Coworkers
  Googling on Office Time
  Having Two Left Hands
  Taking Long Naps at the Workplace
  Lack of Common Sense
  Kissing Bosses Behind
  Being Full Of It !
  Persistently Being Late
  Not Showing Up For Work
  The Most Time Spent at Meetings
  Foul Mouth
  Missmanagement
  Scam Artist
 
CONSOLATION AWARDS
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  Undeniably Sexy Award
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